7-11 clerks are unlike most human beings on planet earth. I know this because I have been to more 7-11s than anyone. I like it there.
There is a star of an employee named Joseph that pumps gas and love through my heart. He is a skinny middle aged black man that loves to talk. He works mornings. During the drowsy wee hours, Joseph still talks a lot.
Today, I decided I needed a Friday cup of coffee. I bring my gum and joe to the counter and ask dear Joseph for a $5 lottery ticket.
“How about I sell you a winning lottery ticket?”
Before Joseph hands me the ticket he bribes: “Now you are going to owe me a Happy Meal when you win.”
“Fine what kind of Happy Meal?” I smile.
“Cheeseburger.” Of course.
Joseph continues, “Oh and you got to deliver it in a limo. Can you imagine? We would probably end up on the Oprah Winfrey show… And one more thing, don’t pull anything funny. I want a boy toy.”